“A wife of noble character who can find? She is worth far more than rubies.” Proverbs 31:10
I remember I was ecstatic when my class came across tribes run by a woman. History has been pretty matriarchal for the most part, and how they treated woman hasn’t been that great. Woman were told how to dress, how to act, how to talk to a man, where they could be, when they could be, and in some cultures, a man had to go with them or they could face arrest. Esther married a king and faced death if she visited her husband without requesting to first. People looked down upon woman and thought because we are smaller and not as physically strong that we weren’t capable of doing as much or more than men, nor did we even have half the brain capacity than men did.
Then woman started to step up. They started teaching kids how to read, mothers how to care for their children and started movements to rid their communities of prostitution and promoted how saving yourself for marriage is important. The woman of that time wanted to rid the world of anything that did not give woman their self-respect and dignity.
Eventually, woman started to fight for the rights that they deserved: the right of the freedom to choose for themselves. Whether it was having a job, voting, or even what they wanted to wear, they could make the choice to do it without a man’s approval. They took their weaknesses and made them strengths, they proved their bravery and showed that they were just as intelligent as men.
Every day I go out into the world and the same question pops into my head: Where are these woman today? Where are the woman who had the determination to fight for themselves and what they deserve? Where are the woman who had class and self-respect? I am a waitress in the food industry. I go out to nice places and enjoy doing things like going to concerts/shows, karaoke, seeing movies, etc. I have served people at work and have seen people from all over different jobs and reputations.
“Her husband has full confidence in her and lacks nothing of value. She brings him good, not harm, all the days of her life.” Proverbs 31:11-12
I have seen woman of all ages barely dressed in trying to get attention from the opposite sex and make those of the same-sex jealous. I’ve also seen those same women get mad when they get disrespected by the guys they are attracting. I get upset at the idea that woman feel that they have to dress that way to get attention. I get upset when they think they’ll attract a good guy dressed like that.
I’ve seen woman jump each other and turn against their families and friends for the dumbest reasons: someone slept with someone they weren’t supposed to, they dressed wrong, the list goes on. I’ve seen woman act nasty toward both men and other woman for no reason. They speak rotten words to people instead of breathing life into them. I’ve seen woman stay in relationships with men who had no motivation to get a job to help them out in keeping food on the table and the bills paid, who won’t even attempt to make them happy. I’ve seen them struggle and go through depression over circumstances that I know they have the strength to change, but won’t because they don’t want to or they’re conditioned to believe they are too weak from a bad relationship with a current or ex-boyfriend/husband, a parent/other family members, or a friend/group of friends.
“She is clothed with strength and dignity; she can laugh at the days to come. She speaks with wisdom, and faithful instruction is on her tongue.” Proverbs 31:25-26
I’m so sick of hearing woman slut-shaming each other, of them trying to screw up each other’s lives or the lives of men that broke their hearts. It only gives men a reason to do the same thing to woman, and I know none of us like it when our exes go around saying awful things about us (or any man or woman for that matter). I get so tired of seeing woman hate men and say awful things to them in the name of feminism. I just want to tell them to sit down because they don’t even know what it is.
“Her children arise and call her blessed; her husband also, and he praises her: “Many women do noble things, but you surpass them all.” Proverbs 31:28-29
And so my question still stands. Where are these woman today in 2016? Where is the love that encourages people? Where is the compassion that helps people? Where are the words that give people hope? Where is the strength? Where is the class? When will woman have the reality check and realize that they are more than what they think they are? When will they learn that they have power in this world?
Those woman did not fight for us to have freedom so that we could choose to dress skimpy, have sex with anyone we want at whatever age we want, put ourselves in dangerous situations, etc. They didn’t fight so that we would feel trapped or isolated, or so we would believe the lies that are told to us by media and others who want to tear us down. They didn’t fight for us to lose our dignity and self-respect. They didn’t want nude photos or secret videos of us being intimate with someone to get on the internet because we let our guard down for one night. They fought so that we could put our feminine touch in this world and make a difference. No one is going to take us seriously if we keep settling and downgrading ourselves.
So next time you speak to someone, think about what you say. Next time you go out, think about what you wear, if you should have that drink even though you’ve already exceeded your normal limit, if you should be out with those friends or not. Next time you get into a relationship, wonder if you should be with that person physically, emotionally, and mentally. Think about who you are and wonder if that’s the woman you are supposed to be. It’s time to start changing this world.
“Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting; but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised. Honor her for all that her hands have done, and let her works bring her praise at the city gate.” Proverbs 31:30-31