“A wife of noble character who can find? She is worth far more than rubies.” Proverbs 31:10
I remember I was ecstatic when my class came across ethnic groups run by a woman. History has been pretty matriarchal for the most part, and how they treated woman hasn’t been that great. Women were told how to dress, how to act, how to talk to a man, where they could be, and when they could be. In some cultures, a man had to go with them or they could face arrest. Esther married a king and faced death if she visited her husband without requesting to first. People looked down upon woman. They thought because we’re smaller, and not as physically strong, we aren’t capable of doing as much or more than men. They also assumed we didn’t have half the brain capacity than men did.
Then, women started to step up. They started teaching kids how to read, mothers how to care for their children and started movements to rid their communities of prostitution. Instead, they promoted how saving yourself for marriage is important. The woman of that time wanted to rid the world of anything that did not give woman their self-respect and dignity.
Eventually, women started to fight for the rights that they deserved: the right of the freedom to choose for themselves. Whether it was having a job, voting, or even what they wanted to wear, they could make the choice to do it without a man’s approval. They took their weaknesses and made them strengths, they proved their bravery and showed that they were just as intelligent as men.
Every day I go out into the world and the same question pops into my head: Where are these woman today? Where are the woman determined to fight for themselves and what they deserve? Where are the woman with class and self-respect? I am a waitress in the food industry. I go out to nice places and enjoy doing things like going to concerts/shows, karaoke, seeing movies, etc. I have served people at work and have seen people from all over with different jobs and reputations.
“Her husband has full confidence in her and lacks nothing of value. She brings him good, not harm, all the days of her life.” Proverbs 31:11-12
I have seen women of all ages barely dressed in trying to get attention from the opposite sex and make those of the same-sex jealous. I’ve also seen those same women get mad when they get disrespected by the guys they are attracting. I get upset at the idea that woman think they have to dress that way to get attention. I get upset when they think they’ll attract a good guy dressed like that.
I’ve seen women jump each other and turn against their families and friends for the dumbest reasons. Those being: someone slept with someone they weren’t supposed to, they dressed wrong, the list goes on. I’ve seen women act nasty toward both men and other women for no reason. They speak rotten words to people instead of breathing life into them. I’ve seen woman stay in relationships with men who had no drive to get a job to help them out.
These men aren’t keeping food on the table and the bills paid. They won’t even attempt to make them happy. I’ve seen them struggle and go through a depression over circumstances that I know they have the strength to change, but won’t. They don’t want to or they’re conditioned to believe they are too weak from a bad relationship with a current or ex-boyfriend/husband, a parent/other family members, or a friend/group of friends.
“She is clothed with strength and dignity; she can laugh at the days to come. She speaks with wisdom, and faithful instruction is on her tongue.” Proverbs 31:25-26
I’m so sick of hearing woman slut-shaming each other, and trying to screw up each other’s lives or the lives of men that broke their hearts. It only gives men a reason to do the same thing to a woman. I know none of us like it when our exes go around saying awful things about us (or any man or woman for that matter). It’s tiring to see women hate men and say awful things to them in the name of feminism. I just want to tell them to sit down because they don’t even know what it is.
“Her children arise and call her blessed; her husband also, and he praises her: “Many women do noble things, but you surpass them all.” Proverbs 31:28-29
And so my question still stands. Who are these woman today in 2016? Where is the love that encourages people? Where is the compassion that helps people and the words that give people hope? The strength, the class, and the dignity? When will woman reality check themselves and realize that they’re more than what they think they are? When will they learn that they have power in this world?
Those women did not fight for us to have freedom so that we could choose to dress skimpy, have sex with anyone we want at whatever age we want, and put ourselves in dangerous situations. They didn’t fight so that we would feel trapped or isolated. Those women didn’t fight so we would believe media’s lies and others who want to tear us down. They didn’t fight for us to lose our dignity and self-respect. They didn’t want nude photos or secret videos of us being intimate with someone to get on the internet because we let our guard down for one night. We were fought for so that we could put our feminine touch in this world and make a difference. No one is going to take us seriously if we keep settling and downgrading ourselves.
So next time you speak to someone, think about what you say. Next time you go out, think about what you wear if you should have that drink even though you’ve already exceeded your normal limit, if you should be out with those friends or not. Next time you get into a relationship, wonder if you should be with that person physically, emotionally, and mentally. Think about who you are and wonder if that’s the woman you are supposed to be. It’s time to start changing this world.
“Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting; but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised. Honor her for all that her hands have done, and let her works bring her praise at the city gate.” Proverbs 31:30-31